You're allowed to follow your instincts
it’s our job to follow those solitary tracks.
Dear reader,
The conversation with my therapist this past week went like this:
Therapist: “So tell me what’s been going..”
Me: *In a tone of despair rambles off the list of changes and emotions this year has brought
Therapist: “I see.. so what do you want to focus on today?”
Me: “I don’t know and that’s really the problem, I feel like I don’t know the answer to anything anymore.”
She gave me a look as if to say “I highly doubt that” and then proceeded into the most pressing topic.
About 10 minutes into the conversation she paused and said, “For someone who doesn’t know the answer to anything, you seem to be very quick to respond to my questions. I just laid out two directions you could go in this situation and without even a pause in breath you told me which way you’d like to go. It seems like you do know what you want and what you don’t want.”
I left that 1hr conversation feeling lighter than I have in months. Not because anything drastically changed in my life but because the mountain of shoulds, coulds, and woulds that had been swirling in my mind suddenly felt silly and useless being there.
You see, I’m someone who tends to want to be the fixer, people pleaser, and just overall perfect human being (this doesn’t exist)—and I found myself over and over again bottling everything up creating even more friction in my life.
The most recent eye opener was a recent trip back to Ohio visiting family. By the end of the trip I found myself throwing a perfectly good ice cream out the window while trying to jump out of a moving car because I had reached my breaking point. Not my finest moment.
Between the therapy session and the menty b I had visiting back home, I realized how much I weigh my own decisions based on how it will make someone else feel.
Compassion is one thing, self-destruction is another.
Ironically—or not ironically, you know how the universe is—I headed into the studio the next day after the therapy session to start recording a song based on one of my all time favorite books, Women Who Run With The Wolves.
Without spilling the tea too much, it’s a song about feminism, capitalism, and fighting the good fight.
Recording that song was a reminder to myself to trust my instincts. I wouldn’t have even been in that studio if I wouldn’t have trusted my instincts 4 years ago to pick up a guitar and randomly start writing and singing.
No one told me to do that. In fact, there were a few people in my life at the time who thought I was making a mistake—they thought it was just a quarter life crisis I was having and eventually I would come back to my old life.
There are countless moments where I cannot explain why I made the decision I did besides “it just felt right” or “it just felt wrong.” To me, instincts are our intuition asking us to take action. Every time I trusted my instincts, I ended up exactly where I needed to be.
I think that’s what I had been mostly struggling with when I said I didn’t know the answers anymore. All the outside noise was crowding out that quiet nudge. I didn’t want to let down others or make them feel discomfort. I wanted to follow the logical advice, the easy blueprints society dishes out, and somehow make everyone I love happy. But the wild woman in me is having none of that anymore. She is busy howling at the moon, uncaring if she might look like a fool to someone else because she feels free.
I share that in hopes it gives you permission in your own life. If you are doing something for the good of yourself and it is not harming another (I don’t mean causing them discomfort), there should be no explanation needed. You can obviously navigate and share your choices in a compassionate way but sometimes there just aren’t words to explain it. Our instincts know something we don’t know and it’s our job to follow those solitary tracks.
All the love,
Rosemary
ANNOUNCEMENTS
SINGLE RELEASE - SEPTEMBER 5TH - “BETTY & JESSE”
It’s a cautionary tale about repeating generational patters. Fun stuff. I’ll share all the links and what not when it’s live!
“BETTY & JESSE” SINGLE RELEASE PARTY
When: Saturday, September 6th / 7-9pm
Where:
1865 Club
610 21st Ave N #10
Nashville TN, 37203
Admission: Free but tips encouraged :)
ADDITIONAL SHOWS
08.31.25 Charleston, WV - The Empty Glass / 9pm
09.20.25 Johnston City, TN - The Generalist Store / 7pm
P.s. aside from boosting my ego and helping me grow this community—subscribing will get future letters sent straight to your email. What are you waiting for? :D
Rosemary how are you screaming through the softest whisper?
Compassion not self destruction! That was a punch I will not be recovering from in a minute! But I necessary call to introspect and take the right actions.
I’ve missed you! I’m sad you threw your icecream out but happy you got out from all the rubble! I wish I could attend your shows! Break a leg and Have the best time performing!